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Saturday, March 29, 2014

Wanted

I want you
I always have
In the silence of the summer breeze
And the first time you took my breath
I wanted you
When you said you loved me in the middle of a crowded street
And when you whispered it in between our sheets
I wanted you
When we lay in bed nothing to do, nothing to say
And when a  million things came our way
I wanted you
In the secrecy of our smiles
And the loudness of our definition
I wanted you
When we were happy
And when we were mad
I wanted you
When we fought
And when we cried
I wanted you when you slammed the door
And walked out on me
When the days turned into months and the summer into winter
I wanted you
When the years showed on my face
And people wondered why I was alone
I wanted you
In the quiet of my loneliness
And the angst of my fantasies
Yes, I wanted you
When I saw you with someone else
And when that broke my heart
I wanted you
I always have
In the foolishness of unrequited
And when you came knocking
Coughing up a story
About how you loved me
How you were afraid
How you never loved anyone before me
I wanted you even when I said I didn't
I wanted you
I always will
Pin for you
Lover of my youth
So I believe you
That you want me too

Wednesday, March 19, 2014

Lilies

She talked of loving like it was easy
Like picking out an outfit for the day


She loved me freely
Without a care
Never being afraid


To her
I always said yes
Yes, I'll date you
Yes, I want you
Yes, I'll kiss you
Yes, I love you


It was easy
Loving her


She talked of chasing dreams
Like it was a walk down the street
She was so beautiful
Like soaked sidewalks
After the rain
Like blood red roses
And white lilies


But without her
I doubted all we were
How could I
Love her


She talked of tomorrow
Like we had all of today
Distant
Never coming
Because tomorrow will be today
She'd say


She made me smile
Like ocean waves and chocolate cookies
Make me smile
She made me cry
Like sad movies
And old photographs
She made me feel
More than I've ever felt
Heaven in a few seconds
Of riding waves
And labored breaths


My whole life depended
On one smile
On a set of pure blue eyes
On long brown hair
And soft kisses


I wanted to set her free
Free from me
But I stayed
Because I was selfish
And I wanted to live


Friday, March 14, 2014

A little dreamer girl



She dreamed dreams of gold


Spun with silk from the sun and the wonder of our children


She dreamed of kingdoms lost and battles won long ago


But everyone around her said that she was wrong


Those dreams just don't exist, wake up, my dear


And so the little dreamer girl grew up alone


Lost in a world of her own


She didn't know where she belonged


She forged a home for her dreams and called it sanctuary


Between the tip of a pencil and the edge of a book


In the fabric of canvas and the rush of a brush


The dreamer was an artist


But everyone said she was crazy


Dreams are only fantasies


And for a while she too fumbled in the mud


In forced hunger laced with whisky


And blades laced with tears


But, she got up one day and decided she was better


She was the savior of her dreams


And she wrote away her dreams in the lines of pages


And the glicees of prism colors


And now people say, "It's beautiful"


The portrait hanging on the wall, 'who drew it?"


And the artist smiles and never says more than these four words,


" A little dreamer girl"







Sunday, March 2, 2014

Yellow

She twisted my words
And eveloped my dreams
And took me away to a land 
I thought I wanted to be in
It was beautiful then
I was hers
But it wasn't what it seemed
Putrid thoughts festered at the seams
It was nightmare weaved into heaven

Yellow my lady yellow
The color of sunshine spilling in darkness

And she coaxed my smile
I so wanted the lie to last awhile
She stole my will
Coated my hopes
And made me a world I had dreamed of
But it wasnt real
A sickenning feel
Seeped from my happines with her

Yellow my lady yellow
The color of gold spilled on the earth

I seeked a way out of the dream
Kingdom come and sordid screams
And now that I've had my way
I sit and miss the day
She made me smile
Because she was a lie I wanted to keep
And now I cry everynight  before I sleep