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Sunday, June 29, 2014

the remains of today


We will put away today

We will lay it to rest

With the setting of the sun

And the quieting of the sea

We will close our eyes

Until tomorrow

When we go on

With what remains of today

In the ruble of the storm

And the ashes of the fire

And the left over of our dreams

We will go on

Because we never give up

And we never falter

We just pause

We lay today to rest

Until tomorrow

When we go on

With what remains of today

Looking for treasure

In the depths of the sea

And looking for love

In the depths of your eyes

Today might have not gone my way

But I will continue tomorrow

With the shattered pieces of my heart

I will start anew

From the pile leftover today

Thursday, June 26, 2014

Fear of the unknown

"are you afraid?" 

"what's there to be afraid of?"

"forgiveness"

"afraid to forgive who?"

"me"

"you?"

"yes"

"why, I have nothing to forgive you "

"you do now"

"I would forgive you anything"

"don't speak without knowing"

"I know"

"you do?"

"about her?'

"I'm sorry"

"don't be, you're still here"

"she was beautiful and I was weak"

"but you are strong now"

"so do you?"

"do I what?"

"forgive me?"

"no"

silence

"there is nothing to forgive you"

"I only love you"

"I know"

"do you?"

"I have always loved you and I will always love you"

"good"

"just don't betray me again"

"I won't"

"Are you afraid?"

"of what?"

"of failing?"

"terrified"

"I thought so"

"but I have you"

"forever"

"I am not afraid anymore"

"good"

Monday, June 9, 2014

Purpose ::


The shadow pressed happiness out of my hands
It pried them open and took it away
It was hard to see
And the darkness pressed love out of my heart
It ran down my flesh and on the bed
Red and warm
My thoughts grew hazy
Like words before slumber
The lights grew dim
And it was hard to breathe
I wanted someone to save me
Because I still had a fight in me
Because it had taken me until that moment
To realize I wasn’t ready to be defeated
But I knew the house was empty
And silence fell
Like the quietude of a graveyard
The sounds were distant
Faint palpitations of a dying heart
I saw the end
And it wasn’t time
So I got up bleeding inside and out
I still have the scars
They will always be there
But the wounds have healed long ago
Never again shall darkness steal
Something that belongs to me
I have learned there is a purpose
And the purpose is to help you

Saturday, June 7, 2014

Love Again ::

there was a somber nostalgia about her
a quiet sadness that walked behind each step
in every smile and every laugh
we all knew her soul had seen
a great many more things than any of us

there was a deep longing
hidden in every flattering word she spoke
and though she tried to hide it
we all knew it since the day he left

she swore she'd thrive without him
and succeeded she did
but he had broken her heart
her faith in love
and even if she had wanted to
which she didn't want to
she could not love again

she said she didn't need anyone
and the clack of her heels
on marble floors
seemed to accent that it was true

but there was a drowning loneliness around her
that was only visible
under the layers of silk scarfs and expensive perfumes
the nostalgia that lingered
like fog does by the bay

and she knew that even if she tried
even though she was so young
she could not love again


Thursday, June 5, 2014

Accomplished ::

And wouldn't you say I'm accomplished? A big city girl with dreams of beauty. Shadow in the dark, playing piano in the night wearing black dresses and high heels. I can speak spanish and french and romance you with poetry written in church bench. I can paint and I can draw and sew patterns on a board. I can make perfect pairing of dessert and wine, I can dance a ball and debate politics. Wouldn't you say I'm accomplished? A diploma hanging on a wall all means nothing, if I don't have you.

It's been over a year and I'd give it all up for you. Knowledge that once serves to make me know I am lonelier that alone. And all the books resting on my wall have lied, you left and life has died. I handwrite all my notes, and garden all my roses. Wouldn't you say I'm accomplished? Meeting each and every goal, I can critique literature and art and tell you the story and our part. But darling nothing matters if you're not here with me.